I can already feel the migraine.

I really hate waking up to a migraine.  It just sets the rest of the day up for, well failure.   I’m trying to get myself out of this groove. I’m making a bagel with my favorite type of cream cheese, coffee, and I took some pain reliever as well.  So hopefully my mood will change prior to starting my work day.

I’ve been having the vivid strange dreams lately.  I’ve had a dream every night since Monday.

I have applied to Davenport this morning.  *Breathes*  I’m not sure why I’m getting so stressed out about this.   Sometimes I wish I were the type of person who could be content with what they had.  Maybe that has something to do with knowing what you want in the first place.  It’s funny, looking back now, and how I’m just now starting to actually look deeper into different career choices.  Wasn’t I supposed to do this, gee, Senior Year of high school? It really amazes me how much I thought I knew my life was going to go.  And I was so certain of it, like nothing was going to stop me. 

Friends change too, some are hard to see go, and some aren’t so much.  You’re always meeting new people in life, and shaping who you are as you grow up.  It’s healthy to meet new people and make new friends.  Sometimes it feels as if friends can hold you back, because they don’t want to grow with you, or they grow in an opposite direction.  Sometimes we all just need to shut the fuck up and figure ourselves out.  I never would have imagined life as I live it now in high school.   And that just shows me how much I really didn’t know about life itself.

I’m at a point in my life where I need to make a decision.  I’m teetering on a choice between a Kid and an adult.  (Even though… we all know I should be grown up by now… Or at least well into figuring out what it means to be “grown up” haha)  My wants are changing for what I want out of life.  So let’s just see where it ends up taking us.  But the first step is to try.

I’m not that dependent woman.  I’ve never been her.  So it’s time for me to stop acting like it.

I wish you peace, love, and happiness <3